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11th July 2005

2:12pm: suffocating my sanity
Sometimes I lay awake wondering why things have to be the way they are.
Why are some things so complicated? Why are some things so profound?
Why are some things so indescribable...and so...enigmatic, that our brains
attempt to process these "ideas" ending in nothing but complete confusion?
Why can't we look at a white rose and see it as just that?

Why do we have to ponder so deeply on simple things?

We wrap these thoughts around our brains like yards of rope around our throats, suffocating every last trace of sanity.
<>
Sometimes I just wish my thoughts were mechanical. Routine things that never changed. Maybe life would be a bit easier then...or maybe it would just make it that much worse.

All I can do is to sit here, pondering things that need not be pondered and coil myself into a mental suffocation...numbing out any last feeling of reality.
Current Mood: blank
Current Music: flunk_how.does.it.feel

(CARE TO SLIT A WRIST ?

23rd June 2005

10:04am: im off to california for the next 4 days.



just so you know...




callin or texting me is ok.

*kisses*
Current Mood: tired

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21st June 2005

2:38pm: Tripppys


ahem.

Thursday & Friday: Santa Monica

Saturday , Sunday & Monday: Catalina Island


I will be taking a bajillion pictures...probably
Current Mood: chipper

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19th June 2005

1:21pm:


last night i came to find out that
i have crazy stalkers after me.
not one, not two, but five of them.
the cops do a whole lot of nothing
about it.

my grandpa died today.


happy effin fathers day.

each day gets worse than the previous.
what next, i ask.
Current Mood: morose
Current Music: enigma- sadness

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17th June 2005

2:41am: ugh
im such a moron.
Current Mood: disappointed

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11th June 2005

12:27pm: I'm in such a lovely mood!
I suppose it's time to update.
Plus, Johnny needs something to read lol.

life = madness.

alot of people from the past poppin up
again. some i am happy about, others,
well... not so much.

workin at the hospital is quite hectic,
but VERY interesting. I like it.

the semester has been over since may 20th
and boy am i glad. i pulled 6 As and 1 B+
not too happy about the B, but then again
I'm extact lol. Math 132 was tough!

Story time:
This lovely girl named Shandra was the first
friend that I made in America. After I moved
away from wisconsin, we kept in touch a few years,
but then somehow lost contact. apparently we have
been looking for each other for about 7 years now.
LOVELY MYSPACE :) haha we finally found each other
and she will be here on wednesday to stay with me
for 2 weeks :) we're gonna go to cali and arizonie
and have mucho funs. im soooo stoked! :)

OH AND I CANNOT BELIEVE ITS JUNE, AND ITS BEEN
HIGH 80'S LOW 90'S !!!! IT SHOULD BE 120 RIGHT
NOW!!! OH ANDDDDD ITS CLOUDY :-D I DONT THINK I COULD
BE HAPPIER. teehee

so long loveys.
Current Mood: ecstatic
Current Music: Mudvayne- Goodbye

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20th May 2005

12:10am:

Im done.
Finished.
El Feeeeen...



:end:
Current Mood: exhausted
Current Music: nekromantix- dead girls dont cry

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15th May 2005

2:20am: show me some love
o0o0o o0o0o o0oo0!!!


GO LOOK!

www.myspace.com/sadisticdecimation


click on view more pics :D


yay!


night darlings!
Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: Joan Jett & The Blackhearts: I love rock and roll

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12th May 2005

2:01am: Ladida


Your Political Profile



Overall: 80% Conservative, 20% Liberal

Social Issues: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

Personal Responsibility: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

Fiscal Issues: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

Ethics: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

Defense and Crime: 100% Conservative, 0% Liberal


Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Mars Volta

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11th May 2005

7:19pm: Look what i just bought!

well, ordered:


http://www.daddyos.com/retro/whtros.html

and

http://www.daddyos.com/retro/dprs8.html

oh i'm so excited!!!
Current Mood: giggly
Current Music: DIE FORM

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5th May 2005

5:39pm:

man, FUCK this day.
Current Mood: infuriated
Current Music: Otep- Buried Alive

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2nd May 2005

11:48am: Paris 1919


It's interesting to sit in a library and
watch people.

There is a girl in here that I slightly
dispise. She's in one of my English classes.
I actually ran across her profile
on myspace one day. She's one
of those girls that takes pics
in her bra and panties in poses
I'd rather not see. She has a yellow
S10. With SkIN girls on her back window.
She drives like an asshole and it pisses me off.

Maybe I'll go tell her what a skank she is.
That might make me feel better.

Today is a bitter day. But maybe you've noticed.

I'm going to Valley Hospital in about an hour
to turn in my application.
After that, I have to finish my Genocide
presentation. Stupid Sociology.

I should be done with my microeconomics class
by tonight, if I haul ass and finish my exams.
That makes me smile.

Ok, enough mindless blabber.

Have a good day.
Current Mood: apathetic
Current Music: Nightwish- Ever Dream

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25th April 2005

9:10pm:

my grammy is in the hospital.
i cant take this

what else is going to go wrong.

first baby Bradley, then grandpa, now
my grammy.

this is the worst sememster ever.

the tears wont stop streaming down my face.
Current Mood: crushed

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24th April 2005

1:54am: Super heros and Bellyaches

Tonight was a blast.

Matt came over and
we went to walmart. haha wow.
we were on a mission to buy capes, *mine was betty boop*
aviator glasses, ice cream, and plastic
weapons. oh. and a frisby.
matt hit me in
the face with a soccer ball in the toy section
and gave me a fat lip.
so we got all our supplies, and headed
to the park where we proceeded to be super
heros on swings and ate half a gallon of
cookies and cream ice cream.
matt decided that my superhero name was going
to be 'captain phat lip' and he wanted to be
sex kitten. so i wrote 'Lt. Sex Kitten D'Lux'
on his arm in sharpie...he has to work tomorrow haha.

then adam came and all chaos broke loose.
i was tossed down some slides a few times,
we fought a little, threw the frisby at each other,
fell off some things, all in all had a blast.
haha silly boys. i love my friends.

good times good times.

oh, then we went and got rockstars...which i drank
right after i chugged my creatine. my belly hurts and im
a dummy.

:END:
Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: Ciara - Oh

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17th April 2005

10:14pm:

why does everyone take everything the wrong way
Current Mood: aggravated

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12th April 2005

2:36pm:

*sigh*
I just found out a bunch of stuff that
stresses me out. To the fullest.

I'll be ok though right?
I'm a ninja. . . I should be able
to handle it all.

Oh and what is it with everyone trying
to play match-maker and set me up?
Is it so wrong to be single?
I do not get it.
Current Mood: calm
Current Music: Killswitch Engage- When Darkness Falls

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7th April 2005

4:33pm: What is the worst feeling in the world?

It's when your air passage gets blocked
by something while you're asleep. You know
what's going on and you see it happening in
your dreams as you gasp for air. You feel
suffocation slowly creeping in and taking
your life away, yet you cannot wake up.
All of the sudden, God decides to breathe
air back into you and it stops. You finally
wake up, dizzy, weak, and still gasping
for that precious oxygen. And that, ladies
and gentlemen is the worst feeling in the world.

My prediction for the future:
"Dagna died today at age XX. Cause of death:
SUFFOCATION"

(this could be one of the worst ways to go)

**By the way, this is not just a dream, I almost died*

Have a good day.
Current Mood: nervous

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4th April 2005

1:09am:
Why have I been feeling so worthless lately.
Why do I just want to go to bed and sleep forever.
Not do anything for the rest of my life except sit
on my ass.

Why do am I starting to blow off things at school.
Why am I starting not to care.

This isn't like me...

It's getting scary.
Current Mood: blank

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3rd April 2005

1:54am:

YAY!!!!!
I got my nose pierced today.
I LOVE it.
*sigh*
piercings make me so happy

I'm tired from all of this.
Too much excitment for one day
hehe
Current Mood: excited

(CARE TO SLIT A WRIST ?

1st April 2005

12:37pm: Newsy


Everyone need to add my new name on myspace.
Yes, I'm back:

http://www.myspace.com/12343542

Thanks!! :)

P/S

People suck. (especially people of the male persuasion)
Have a good day.
Current Mood: blank
Current Music: DJ Z Trip/Chester- Walking Dead

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28th March 2005

10:28am: Im hooked on you i need a fix....
It's like you're a drug
It's like you're a demon I can't face down
It's like I'm stuck
It's like I'm running from you all the time
And I know I let you have all the power
It's like the only company I seek is misery all around
It's like you're a leech
Sucking the life from me
It's like I can't breathe
Without you inside of me
And I know I let you have all the power
And I realize I'm never gonna quit you over time

It's like I can't breathe
It's like I can't see anything
Nothing but you
I'm addicted to you
It's like I can't think
Without you interrupting me
In my thoughts
In my dreams
You've taken over me
It's like I'm not me
It's like I'm not me

It's like I'm lost
It's like I'm giving up slowly
It's like you're a ghost that's haunting me
Leave me alone
And I know these voices in my head
Are mine alone
And I know I'll never change my ways
If I don't give you up now


I'm hooked on you
I need a fix
I can't take it
Just one more hit
I promise I can deal with it
I'll handle it, quit it
Just one more time
Then that's it
Just a little bit more to get me through this
I'm hooked on you
I need a fix
I can't take it
Just one more hit
I promise I can deal with it
I'll handle it, quit it
Just one more time
Then that's it
Just a little bit more to get me through this
Current Mood: mischievous

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27th March 2005

4:35pm: Brian. the world revolves around you.


I have about 80 bajillion things to
do today (of which I have completed
maybe 1/2 of one..) and so little
time left!!!!

Help...

Back massages are encouraged.

Happy Resurrection Day all.
Current Mood: aggravated
Current Music: Portishead- Mysterons (PNYC)

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26th March 2005

6:49pm: Stagnancy of the Brain


I have a 200 pt. literary analysis due tomorrow
night and my brain doesn't seem to want to work.

I love writing these things...and I usually kick
ass.
What has been going on with me lately?

Lame.
Current Mood: worried
Current Music: Portishead- Glory Box

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2:28am:

tonight sucked.


:(
Current Mood: lethargic

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23rd March 2005

11:41pm:
I hate mirgranes.

I feel awful.
Current Mood: sick

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